I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
