does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
