You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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