once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.