Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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