I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
