U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
