idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
