broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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