What a fucking waste of an outfit
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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