i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
