when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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