And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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