I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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