fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize