Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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