just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
