I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
