she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize