Where did you get a picture of my penis
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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