just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize
