I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
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do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
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Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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