could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
