Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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