Don't you send me to vm
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
