i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
If I die, sorry about rent.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
