Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
