Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
