Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
