I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
