why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
