My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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