I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
