I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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