? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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