THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I need to calm my uterus...
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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