i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Randomize