Texts From Last Night

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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.

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  (484): you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it. http://tfl.nu/od01
  Replies (3) Good night (1226) Bad night (628)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate

  (415): View more from California

  i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube

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  (702): chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate (415): i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube http://tfl.nu/nhs2
  Replies (8) Good night (2366) Bad night (631)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.

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  (313): I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son. http://tfl.nu/7jxb
  Replies (13) Good night (664) Bad night (2458)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Used tampon in my purse. That from you?

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  (330): Used tampon in my purse. That from you? http://tfl.nu/lpyn
  Replies (27) Good night (660) Bad night (9186)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.

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  (314): screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all. http://tfl.nu/filb
  Replies (21) Good night (5463) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.

  (1405): View more from

  I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?

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  (405): If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie. (1405): I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes? http://tfl.nu/u9sc
  Replies (47) Good night (10220) Bad night (1020)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals

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  (770): Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals http://tfl.nu/cikb
  Replies (17) Good night (1737) Bad night (820)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.

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  (864): We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom. http://tfl.nu/8ad4
  Replies (1) Good night (655) Bad night (743)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.

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  (719): I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster. http://tfl.nu/ckt2
  Replies (8) Good night (1709) Bad night (497)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.

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  (201): I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe. http://tfl.nu/ihd3
  Replies (3) Good night (743) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.

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  (618): You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there. http://tfl.nu/4ob2
  Replies (6) Good night (961) Bad night (517)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on

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  (701): I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on http://tfl.nu/r00x
  Replies (2) Good night (1037) Bad night (294)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.

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  (614): im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year. http://tfl.nu/ildj
  Replies (1) Good night (462) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me

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  (519): You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies (1-519): Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me http://tfl.nu/hhrg
  Replies (1) Good night (523) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...

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  (330): Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night... http://tfl.nu/aq2u
  Replies (2) Good night (529) Bad night (306)

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