i was born a porn star she said
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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