We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
