i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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