im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
