I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
