So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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