she was so not down for the gang bang
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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