she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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