i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
i think im in europe. pls send help
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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