This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
they're like a gay fantastic four
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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