Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
