it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
you win again, gameday.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
