redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
